Resolution Revolution!
You in? OR You Out?
There’s something about this time of year that throws me off. I feel this pressure to fall into some sort of elusive rhythm I am meant to be a part of. I often have this ideal vision of my life. Me in it- just flowing from one thing to the next with an ease and grace. I get my writing done, then my 4 mile walk happens — somewhere in there I teach a couple yoga classes, prep an amazing (healthy) meal while watching Jamie Oliver. I learn a new song on the ukulele and then relax into an evening of macroweaving. Finally, I get ready for bed with the calm assurance of a productive amazing day. As I easily drift off to sleep, I feel a chipper excitement for a brand new tomorrow…
Years ago a friend told me that she pictured me like Snow White, with little birdies helping me get dressed in the morning as I dreamily floated from one place to the next. The reality of that comparison is, while there are no flitting birds around my shoulders, it is possible that I may contain the neuroses of all seven dwarfs. These early winter days, mostly Grumpy resides. I am befriending my shadows.
Goals, resolutions, and intentions do have an immense impact on moving us in the direction of what we want. But the commercialized drive to be a better version of ourselves makes us feel terrible. I am not immune.
I show up to the keyboard wanting to share or inspire. It feels vulnerable to put out into the world, “I am not awesome, right now.” “I am not on fire to do what I am called to do.” I need more introspection and space for visioning. I seek a desperate dedication to my own self-care. I can feel the uncomfortable friction. There are cross currents between where I am and what I want. They tell me one thing: I need more time.
Revolution, Evolution, In-volution; the Spiraling Nature of Change
The solace lies in different pathways that can support us toward any transformation. There is a different timing for each of us. Some may hide away to avoid the entire process, others embrace it as a constant. Change, however, is inevitable. We can tarry in the middle only for so long before the discomfort exposes our tipping point.
We spiral from the outside-in or the inside-out, expanding or contracting to make our way. Each path offers a unique approach, yet layered and intertwined. Revolution empowers us to reclaim our own vitality. Evolution reveals understanding by way of experience. Involution leads us inward, beyond the ego’s limitations.
Revolution, the path of sacred self-care. Arogya: In Ayurveda, there is an understanding that ultimate empowerment comes through wellness. It is the foundation for everything else. Arogya translates to being without a trace of incapacity or illness. It’s a reckoning that, without full physical health, we lack the energy to pursue our dreams, and without mental health, we lack clarity in perceiving our lives. This is the revolution: the power to heal lies in our own hands.
Evolution, the path of experience. Boga: Experience is our greatest teachers. We learn through being in and of the world. In relationship to everything and everyone, we gain deeper understanding of ourselves. It’s through these fierce connections that we grow our capacity. To embody love, peace, and compassion, we must feel them—and sometimes, we must experience their opposites. The evolution of all of us exists within each of us.
In-volution, the path of true freedom. Yoga: As we strive and struggle, transfixed by the external world, we live through our own suffering. As we love, we may suffer in loss. When we covet, we suffer in desire. The invitation to liberation begins with a spiral inward. It is the act of letting go and surrendering —not “giving in,” but “giving away” all that we no longer need until, ultimately, we are free of all mechanisms of suffering. Nothing remains to be transformed. All dualities become one. Then one is none.
I am not quite ready for this new year. I have to sit with my shadows. I need to be in my feels. They are my compass. Even Grumpy has a home in who I am becoming. It feels vulnerable to admit, but I am not yet prepared and restored enough for action. Experience has taught me if I force or fake it, the canyon I am attempting to bridge will only widen.
Transformation is not performative. It’s not always easily accessible or obvious. It can’t be bought or hacked. It doesn’t fall into the confines of a calendar. It’s a process. In the becoming, we grow into our own understanding of the world and who we are in it - who we are beyond it.
Go slow. This is the fun part… daydream, imagine, be inspired. Heal, restore, rest. What do you want right now? What do you need? Start your revolution. Live your evolution. Fold into an in-volution. All paths will lead you home.
